Turning another page
what is all this new stuff on my blog? I don't like changes!!!
I get the feeling I have more options to my simple little blog. here, lets play a bit and see what happens. insert block quotes? insert link? italic tags? bold tags? Have I been lifted up to the next level?
This is what happens when you don't get on the blog for a few days. I'm lost in my own blog!
Went to a going away party this weekend for some good friends of mine. It was a "get trashed and go down memory lane, can I say a whole sentance without slurring my words party. ( I'm guilty of that). I wanted to "have some fun" and I got it. I don't think I liked it though. I started looking around me and seeing thing differently. I didn't like what I saw. I didn't want to be a part of a group that night. I wanted to be one on one or noting. So much for the socialbility aspects of my personality. And I'm not even p.m.sing!!
I just wanted a one person conversation and a few cigarettes. People got so trashed. You'd think we were in high school, talking about how lucky we were not to have killed anyone in our younger days. What's that? What about tonight? Lucky for me my husband only has one beer at these gatherings. Not much of a drinker. True Brethren background can do that to ya.
I think I just needed to withdrawl from people. I am pretty sensitive to how people react to me. I've been sensing a lack of "something" from a few . Sometimes I thinks it respect and other time just plain value. It concerns me when this happens. I try to brush it off, but I find myself getting a bit miffed about it, so I hang back until it subsides enough for me to get back into swing of things. I find that it's a time for me to look at myself and try to see what other people see. Who the hell likes to do that? There isn't a gathering that goes by that I don't rerun conversations and cringe at some of the things I've said.
I think it has something to do with this homechooling group I've been hanging with. There are so many highly motivated people that there isn't any room for another. I take this as a call to slow down even more in my life. (why not?) Why put out all the effort when someone or somebodies want to do it? I say "go for it"! and put my feet up and kick back. What an adjustment. But one I obviously need to consider invaluable. I will not do it all anymore! There is always someone else to take your place. WA-HO! Better them than me? right?
So where is this all going? Where do I end up? What is my new focus? Is it me? Is it my kids? Is it my marriage?
~Be aware of wonder. Live a balanced life--learn some and think some and draw and paint and sing and dance and play and work every day some.--Robert Fulghum (All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten)
I get the feeling I have more options to my simple little blog. here, lets play a bit and see what happens. insert block quotes? insert link? italic tags? bold tags? Have I been lifted up to the next level?
This is what happens when you don't get on the blog for a few days. I'm lost in my own blog!
Went to a going away party this weekend for some good friends of mine. It was a "get trashed and go down memory lane, can I say a whole sentance without slurring my words party. ( I'm guilty of that). I wanted to "have some fun" and I got it. I don't think I liked it though. I started looking around me and seeing thing differently. I didn't like what I saw. I didn't want to be a part of a group that night. I wanted to be one on one or noting. So much for the socialbility aspects of my personality. And I'm not even p.m.sing!!
I just wanted a one person conversation and a few cigarettes. People got so trashed. You'd think we were in high school, talking about how lucky we were not to have killed anyone in our younger days. What's that? What about tonight? Lucky for me my husband only has one beer at these gatherings. Not much of a drinker. True Brethren background can do that to ya.
I think I just needed to withdrawl from people. I am pretty sensitive to how people react to me. I've been sensing a lack of "something" from a few . Sometimes I thinks it respect and other time just plain value. It concerns me when this happens. I try to brush it off, but I find myself getting a bit miffed about it, so I hang back until it subsides enough for me to get back into swing of things. I find that it's a time for me to look at myself and try to see what other people see. Who the hell likes to do that? There isn't a gathering that goes by that I don't rerun conversations and cringe at some of the things I've said.
I think it has something to do with this homechooling group I've been hanging with. There are so many highly motivated people that there isn't any room for another. I take this as a call to slow down even more in my life. (why not?) Why put out all the effort when someone or somebodies want to do it? I say "go for it"! and put my feet up and kick back. What an adjustment. But one I obviously need to consider invaluable. I will not do it all anymore! There is always someone else to take your place. WA-HO! Better them than me? right?
So where is this all going? Where do I end up? What is my new focus? Is it me? Is it my kids? Is it my marriage?
~Be aware of wonder. Live a balanced life--learn some and think some and draw and paint and sing and dance and play and work every day some.--Robert Fulghum (All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten)
posted by Lynne at 5/18/2004 04:17:00 PM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home