ACANTHUS MOLLIS~ Bears Breeches

ACANTHUS MOLLIS~ Bears Breeches
Originally uploaded by merelyhere.

sweet williams 2

sweet williams 2
Originally uploaded by merelyhere.

How I love Sweet Sweet William. I want my whole yard to be covered by you. I will definitely be collecting the seed and make some babies!

Went to the doctor yesterday. been feeling bad. I have a gallbladder ultrasound scheduled for monday morning. I'm sure it will be nothing. just bad eating lately. Chris Quinn is or family doctor. He always has a story to tell before we get down to business of the visit. this is a man who has been blessed with six boys. WHOLLY COW! SIX! bada-bing!
anyway, he tell me that the criteria for gallbaldder issues is known as the five factor. That's what they called it in medical school in order for the student to remember all of them. they are;
1) Female
2) Forty
3) Fertile
4) Flatulence
and
5) Fat

Yes, that right.... fat. he looked at me and said "I'm not saying YOUR fat, that's just part of the criteria".
I smiled and said "overweight" F.F.F.F.O!
We laughed!
$45.00.

The air conditioning is back in as of this morning. It sucks but I have 10-12 women coming tonight to sit around a bon fire when it's 90+ degrees out and we need a repres. I believe in the true brethren suffering. I do! but no one will be fainting on my watch. I was so hoping to have a lovely table set up outside to enjoy our meal on. Now we'll just have to sit where ever you can find a spot. so much for my vision.

Ernies Birkinstocks is having their tent sale this morning and I am going!! It's time for a new pair. The old ones need a new sole and cork and that cost almost as much as a new pair. The Ebay thing makes me nervous because I'm not sure how the sandle will feel after I get it on my foot. I hate sending things back or returning stuff. That is the worst part of shopping. Damn Bunion! The price I pay for wearing cheap shoes when waitressing all those years.

Blah Blah.
Nothing deep today. I need to find a blessing for this gathering tonight. that will take me a while.

Going out with the Polovick's Saturday night to the Mishawaka Summer Fest. We are going to see this really good Beatles group play. I think the kids will love it.

It seems like summer is going by fast already. My calendar is filling up for July and August has been taken up with Lorines visit and our vacation. Then school starts. I've slowed myself down this summer. really taking time to enjoy just what is around me. This in it's self will prolong the summer for me. Yes, we have a few things scheduled but there is plenty of down time to enjoy and that I will do. I am hoping Tom and I can take off for a few days just for oursleves. We could sure use it.

Gypsy Moth

female
Originally uploaded by merelyhere.

http://www.in.gov/dnr/entomolo/gypsymoth/pubmeet05.htm

The plane is flying over our area today to sprinkling pheromones flakes to attract the gypsy moth that has infested the northern part of Indiana. This is the time of year they start their mating. The pheromones attracts the male but makes it impossible for him to find a female because the scent is everywhere . unable to mate the male dies without producing any eggs. The oaks are saved just a bit more this year.

Met up with Annie and Kim again last night. what a wonderful night to be outside talking. They are blazing a path for us mothers with daughters. sitting there listening and learning. I want to thank all of those who have blazed a path for us younger familes in one way or another. We as a family have seen the good the bad and the ugly, none of which we have hidden from our daughters. I guess we didn't have a choice in some areas. But that is life. whats to hide?

~And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.--Anais Nin

Roberta

Roberta
Originally uploaded by merelyhere.

Happy Birthday Roberta!
You look great in these colors!

Cooper Hawk

coop
Originally uploaded by merelyhere.

The immatures are a few weeks into their first flights. I tried to get a picture, but my camera isn't THAT good! There were three of them this morning in the back yard. I guess their nest is in the wood to the west this year. A very good thing considering they can cover an entire hosta with one crap!

Getting ready to pot up some plants that I have multiples of to try and sell them next week. Also, starting to collect seeds to propagate new plants for next year hopefully saving and making some money for a change.

This week is mild. I am grateful for this month as a whole, for it has been mild. It's amazing how having Sundays can make a person feel as though they can accomplish more things.
Tom and I need to focus a bit more on ourselves though. We don't keep a consistant thing going when it come to us. There isn't a loud 'squeakiness'
(Like Kids) to get our attention and make things happen.

Eventually, like now, I will say something and he will agree. Nothing will get done about it because I want him to do it, but it won't happen. *sigh* I'm hopeless I know.

I am having a Women's Spiritual Gathering bon fire this Friday!
Several women are getting together for a night of spiritual community, music, and expressive prayer's of concerns.

I have been to one of these gatherings before. They are very moving . It can also be, when uncomfortable for some, a way to walk through a few unopened doors in our lives. But then again, it can also be a little weird, which I'm into sometimes!!!

Lunch with my buddy Harriet on Sunday after church ( no, we are not going). But I think she is bringing a male friend with her from up north. I wonder if this is serious? He has been here for a few weeks already.

Am I gossiping? O' man! Not cool!!! I just want her to be happy. I'll give a full report on Monday! LOL!!!

~Humility is the most difficult of all virtues to achieve, nothing dies harder than the desire to think well of oneself.--T. S. Eliot

Cindy's ankel bracelet

Cindy's ankel bracelet
Originally uploaded by merelyhere.

Cindy E-mailed me and asked if I could make a little summer time muti- colored ankle braclet in silver. My first order! I love it!! Plus I am a looser for forgetting her Birthday last month like the looser I am. Happy Birthday Baby! So I told Kim this and she say "what? she's 25 now?" LOL!!!!! Sorry Kim. See you Tuesday?

Sitting at the computer this morning with a blanket wrapped around me because the front door is open and it is 49 degrees out. I love the crisp mornings. why are we not camping? It's early for me, but it is also Farmers Markets Day with Laureen.
Last nigth was chinese food and movie night witht he girls. we started early so I could go out and mow the front yard for Tom since it is fathersday weekend. The only time Imow all summer. I don't care about the grass. I pull weeds out of the garden and throw them in the grass! The yard from a distance and angle looks awesome. but up close it is moss and pits of dirt.
Father's day starts with , no church and pancakes for breakfast. A whole day of working on an Amplifier, ending with a nice, one time a year, Long John Silvers dinner!!! Just shoot me now!
Maybe we can get him to think a little healthier and jump to Barnabys pizza instead. we'll see. It's his day.

Then It's Back To Me!!!

~If the new American father feels bewildered and even defeated, let him take comfort from the fact that whatever he does in any fathering situation has a fifty percent chance of being right." -- Bill Cosby

back seat of a model "T"

rollercoaster
Originally uploaded by merelyhere.

One one the first rides for the girl's was to drive their first car. The old model "T". The ride of course was on a track, so I felt confident enough to let two 10 year olds take me for a ride while I take af few picture from he back seat. every ride was next to or under or on top of every other ride. I tried real hard to block the whole danger this. I wanted to ask for some daunting stories from he employees, but they were scary employees.

Kim came over yesterday afternoon in lue of the usual Tuesday evening thang. P is off to a youth camp and she had to drive him there that night. What a great church she belongs to with all their activities for their youth. We sat here at the house because I didn't have two nickles to rub together to go anywhere. I had just sent out invitations for a mom's gathering and jewlery making for the 30th. 10 mothers from Holy Cross will be coming here for a child-free evening of socializing and to learn how to make a little something for themselves. I'd be less stressed if just five would come. I reorganized my jewlery supplies while Kim and I talked for a few hours. The weather was Utopic. The temperature and constant breeze through the windows was heaven.
The pool as it turns out, was a great idea! The girls play for hours. While Kim was here, the girls were doing their water ballet dance to "the whinny" song on the radio. It warms my heart to see then play so nice together again. How could I have thought to deny them the water they love so much? simple pleasures.
Now if we can just get Dad to say quit saying "we're broke".


I finished my book "Animal Dreams". I was dissapointed. It wasn't up to snuff like the 'Secret life of Bees' and the ' Bean Tree'. But an okay read anyway. The books I have left to read are too deep for what I am needing this summer.

Other than having a Jam on Saturday, the weekend is ours, again. Father's day will be whatever Tom wants it to be. I don't think the treehouse will be foremost on his list {sigh}.

Today I play in my garden , pulling weeds and moving plants and making plans to move things for next year. Tomorrow I pitch wood chips in the parsonage garden for a few hours. It's getting to the point now thatI want to work on the parsonage garden by myself. control freak!


~All humans are frightened of their own solitude. But only in solitude can we learn to know ourselves, learn to handle our own eternal aloneness.--Han Suyin

101.5 is playing the 70's. I just love this song. It reminds me of my young summer youth.

Chevy Van

I gave a girl a ride in my wagon
Now she crawled in and took control
She was tired as her mind was draggin'
And I said get some sleep--we'll get on down the road
Like a picture she was laying there
And moonlight dancing off her hair
She woke up and took me by the hand
She's gonna love me in my Chevy van
And that's all right with me
Her young face was like that of an angel
And her long legs were tanned and brown
Better keep your eyes on the road son
Better slow this vehicle down 'cause
'Cause like a picture she was laying there
And moonlight dancing off her hair
She woke up and took me by the hand
She's gonna love me in my Chevy van
And that's all right with me
I put her out in a town that was so small
You could throw a rock from end to end
A dirt road main street, she walked off in her barefeet
And it's a shame I won't be passin' through again
Like a picture she was laying there
And moonlight dancing off her hair
She woke up and took me by the hand
We made love me in my Chevy van
And that's all right with me
Yeah like a picture she was laying there
And moonlight dancing off her hair
She woke up and took me by the hand
We made love me in my Chevy van
And that's all right with me
All right with me

No Church Sundays

This Sunday was one of many 'no church sundays'. Because of Tom's work situation, we look forward to the six or so weeks where we don't go and just be together for a whole entire day.

We went to Clear Lake after we felt the rains were no longer a threat. The beach was deserted except for an open tent birthday party for 15 girls about 10yrs old. I watched them play games that were perfectly organized by the mom's. Tom and the girls rented large yellow tubes and had a front row seat in the water to a triple tubing-boat show put on by one of the residence of clear lake. Some really great wipe outs! I took my book and read up against a shaded maple tree. The air temprature was so silky and warm, I felt so completly comfortable sitting there for a few hours reading. A cherry tree on the beach is briming full of two tone pink and yellow cherries that needed to be picked by me!!! I brought home at least a pound. This reminds me of the farmers market. Laureen and I have been going for the past three weeks now. Things are starting to peek for us avid gardners this time of year. I always find something to put it the garden pls the usual fruits and vegies. It's a garantee three hour tour with breakfast. I ordered a hosta variety I didn't have for next week!!! YAHOOEW!
I purchased some herbs and more vegetable plants that had gotten eaten in the garden by some critters. So yesterday I planted everything that was left to plant for the season and put rings of chicken wire around those plants I didn't want to loose again. I was disappointed that the lettuces didn't make it this round. I think the little rocks in the garden were too much for the tender leaves to push through. It's hard to maintain a gareden when it's not at your own home.

The family meeting was uneventful again due to poor planning on the parents behalf. Tom wants to talk about what school work was covered this past week, that always sets the kids off. Maybe I should be filling him in a bit more about the goings on with school. We'll get there. We did decide to get a pool for the back yard!! just one of those blue things you see everywhere. Meeting adjoured!!! Lord!
Time for long story night while mom goes to sleep.

Kalmia latifolia/ Mountain Laruel

Kalmia latifolia
Originally uploaded by merelyhere.

It was a very long day yesterday. I was fortunate enough to have some passengers. A newly remarried mom who graduated from Washington High in 1982. Her two daughters are my girls ages and attend Holy Cross. Infact Kelsey went to preschool with Lena. Another fine example of another full circle for my girls that only I see.

We talked about our lives growing up as kids. What the hell was wrong with our generation of parents? why is it that you don't hear the 'Leave it to Beaver type families anymore?" They are anomalies. Everyone has a story. I think I had this coversation with Annie the other night. We want to tell our stories. We want to connect, and need to connect.
Ede and I questioned how we could be mothers after all the things we've wittnesed and experienced and how we managed to out survive our siblings. A chance to be loved unconditonally , ego, nature. Maybe just the chance.

We talked the whole way there. She says "what can we have to talk about now? Do you want to know more? I have more."

Don't we all.

One flat tire out of the group of six cars loaded. The threat of air conditoning not working in our van hauling seven people was threating but it ended up working, thank you!

We arrived. And yes, Annie it was a pit of hell. It smelled. It was cheesy, expensive and I couldn't wait to leave. (contemplating seriously not doing Girl Scout next year to avoid all these damn field trips from hell). I know, I did this to myself.

In we go with half the troop running to all the scary rides and the other half running away from them. To these kids and parents, this trip is hell. We are waterpark people not amusement park people. So the water people went off to find water amusement rides for the day.
There were three. we had five and a half hours to burn, literally.
One ride was The Log ride. A lazy river (smelly) ride to a conveyor belt and down a steep hill to a flash of light that takes a picture of your contorted face that you can purchase for a heafty price.
Ride over. Five hours and 15 minutes left.
Water wars was next. We purchased four buckets of water ballons and the girl catapulted them at each other. I was barely able to get two photos before they were done. Walking along the isles of 4-H fair type booths and $2.00 bottles of water Roberta and I decide to do the cheesy thing and do the haunted house ride. Bags and water bottles left behind we climed into the cart made for two adults three small kids. Roberta questioned weather or not we could both fit into the cart. We managed fine. We went inside and started up a hill and the cart stopped! "Please don't tell me it because we are two large women who have no bussiness being in this kiddy cart and now we are stuck on this hill". All this while I am hold an orange plastic gun ready to shoot at anything that jumps out at me. The operator guy comes running into the haunted house runs up the hill and puts some kind of brake on the back of the cart and runs away saying "I'll be right back!" What the hell? we are stuck in a haunted house!? I'm stuck on an upward hill in the middle of a haunted house holding an orange plastic target gun! Two long minutes later the guy comes back and he releases the brake and tells us as he is pushing us up the rest of the hill, that we need to ride separatly next time. Roberta and I just looked at each other and laughed so hard I could have cried. This was a one in a life time expereince. "I love you Roberta".

Thank god for a roller coaster water slide though. Most of the girls time was spent doing that to keep cool while we parents baked and threated going into the airconditioned lounge to drink long island ice teas. The smell of corn dogs was making me ill. The whole week has been a horrid of eating the salties, fattiest, sugariest food I've ever eaten in my life. I feel gross. Yesterday was just a continuation of that. If I don't get something leafy and green I will most certainly die today.

Well, thanks for sticking with me on my "We know Lynne isn't going to enjoy this trip". But, I did make every effort not to say too much about how I felt about this whole day until 5:30p.m. We were to leave as a group by 6:00p.m. and I was so ready by 5:30 as the wild girls wanted to squeeze in just one more this and one more that, not taking in concern for the time it would take to walk to the other end of the park and change clothes and be out the door in less than one half hour. I told one girl that was riding with us that the bus leaves at 6:00. This is where they run to someone else and ask if they can do one more ride, again. Quietly, I start to loose it because I have lost my freedom. I have to wait for other people. I can't just come and go as I please. I've been noticing that latley about myself. I find it difficult to be in someones elses time frame. I tried so hard not to get wrapped up in 'my needs' This whole day is for the kids. but I was done. I was just done. Graciousness be damned, Lynne was done. I managed to make things move eventually and we were out the door and on the road by 6:05. Praying that the airocnditioner will work and it did. we made it home in two hours. One very cold Corona beer with lime and hot sauce and I was ready for a shower and my book "Animal Dreams."
Hello Loyd!

Indiana Beach

Indiana Beach
Originally uploaded by merelyhere.

On our way! SOmetimes I wonder how I get myself talked into these things? But A is so excited.......thats the only reason I need. I hope I don't melt.

arisaemadrac.

arisaemadrac.
Originally uploaded by merelyhere.

Sigh.......

jack-in-the-pulpit

jack
Originally uploaded by merelyhere.

The jacks are just past peak. The next session of delvelopement will be looking for the bright red berries that come in the fall. I've search frantically for the 'green dragon' that I think got buried under a huge pile of sand Tom dumped three years ago. No babies in sight either. I think I'll have to dig and try to save it. I haven't seen another one ever anywhere else aound here. {photo above} Sigh..........!

Hot this week. I don't seemed to be bothered yet by the heat. Maybe the humidity hasn't been heavy enough yet to effect me or maybe it is the drugs I'm taking. Tom wants to put in the air conditioner.......ARRGGH!! I have no desire to close up the house. I need my outdoor smells, not the in door staleness of our accumulated breaths! If I'm not complaining usually tom won't put it in. But the last few years he's been the one to insist on it first. I think it has to do with his use of air in his truck for work.

The trip down south is on hold in my mind for now. I know I can do the trip. But I want to let my fears take over so I don't have to go. Why do I do that to myself? And do I do this to myself? Or is this just some way my lifes path is telling me to rethink in a different direction? It seem a pattern to me personally. One where I committe myself to something exciting and then drop it because it can be too much or too overwhelming. My auto response I guess. I feel the need to go just to experience. I feel the need to stay because of looming things that surround the weeks before and after the trip. Making thing convient for the husband and the kids and who ever stays with them at night and do I get back on the weekend because three or four days is enough for me to be away from my family? My heart says stay home. My mind says "what the hells wrong with you?"

Good news from my buddy Cindy. She and Sal are all a go-go for another baby. We wish you the best, always.

~Adventure can be an end in itself. Self-discovery is the secret ingredient that fuels daring.--Grace Lichtenstein

iris 6

iris 6
Originally uploaded by merelyhere.

My iris' are finished. As sad as that is. The storm came through and I had to cut the rest and put them in a vase. These have been the best flowers for cutting for the last four weeks!

The frogs are singing in the creek. The crickets are chirping just outside my window.
I am tired.
looking forward to laying in my bed and smelling the smells of cool night air and all that it carries through my bedroom window.

simple pleasures.
good night.

MACK the puppy

MACK the puppy
Originally uploaded by merelyhere.

Our girls took care of our neighbors plants and fish in the backyard pond for several days while they went camping. When they came back, Ruth came by to pay the girls for the job and brought their newest member of the family. He's as big as a kleenex box and that is about all the size he'll get. Too small to put down for Mackinaw to sniff and inspect.

Today seems to be the last mellow day for the next week; even though I will be working at the parsonage garden for a few hours with my class today (if they show up). Things are really rolling now with end of the year stuff. The girls have their recital tomorrow. We'll be in Elkhart most of the day and taking them out to dinner to celebrate after. Not to mention church that moring. Monday is the girlscout cook out at our house. this year it will be without Tom because he starts so early. Tuesday will be a slight repres meeting Kim. I think Annie will be out of town? I am looking forward to Wednesday. Several of us mom's and daughter's are going to see the Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants, then appetizers and drinks at the Riverfront Cafe. Thursday is the end of the year Girlscout trip to Indian Beach Amusement Park. We'll be gone all day. Friday is Cece's BD party with Kelsey so it will just be Amy for the night. She'll love that. Then a deep breath for Saturday again, minus working on the parsonage garden one last time.

Here's an insert from "The Exquisite Risk",

"Come. There are teachers everywhere in the stories around us,in the stories within us, in the life of expression that sings where we are broken, in the kinship of gratitude that keeps reminding us that we need other as we become the earth".

and:

"To journey without being changed is to be a nomad.
To change without journeying is to be a chameleon.
To journey and be transformed by the journey is to be a pilgrim".

Poision Ivy For Me!!!

Poision Ivy For Me!!!
Originally uploaded by merelyhere.

So for years I have been bragging about how NOT allergic I am to poision Ivy. and Wham! I got it. I think It pays to keep your mouth shut.

The Girls have a spot in the wood to the south of our property, which isn't our property. But it has been left to grow at will. For years the girl's have been playing in there, building their little chairs and forts. They even had a beautiful bottle tree. This bottle tree was important to our girls because the bottles that were hung on its branches were from their friends Rowan and Cadie. They had a little ceremony there at the last gathering and hung these bottles in the tree. that was a lot of work! 20-25 bottles easy. WELL, some teenagers got into that area and maliciously desstroyed everthing the girls had created. They were devesataed for days. They hurt that anyone would destroy what was so precious to them. It was as though they lost their friends again. I said "the only thing that got destroyed were the bottles. Rowan and Cadie are safe and so are your memories of what you created together. No one can take that away from you". Well, that seem to work, but the need to salvage as much as possible was a must. rocks, bottles, wooden stools made for all four girls was pulled out and placed into the garage. I was determind not to let them back into those woods again. It felt threatening to me. So I suggested that they hang out in the woods directy behind out house. No one goes back there. We have a few paths already established for the purpose of picking black rasberries. So how hard could it be to create an extention to those paths and create a new woodland fantasy for the girls? Out comes the weed wacker and off to work I go wacking down everything that would touch the girls as they traveled back into the wood to their new spot. Well, I guess I wacked a bit to much of the ivy stuff and now I have systemic poision ivy. it took several days for it to appear in three to four different places. Itching started and then I got it on my face. I can't have that! So now I am on two weeks of predniesone. I hope to get all the positive effects from this. I can do alright with the lack of sleep as long as I get the energy that comes along with it. I'm going to ignore the rest of the side effect and pretend they don't apply to me (grin).

I remember when they were young

Last night I went out to meet up with Kim and Annie. What a perfect night to be outside . It was just what I needed after this past weekend. Prom pictures of Kim's daughther were presented. How beautifully grown up. Where did the time go? I remember her playing on the swings in my basement with her little brother and my two girls. Wasn't that just a year or so ago? Annie's Daughter wearing fun funky clothes. Recently I had come across some two year old birthday party pictures of Kelsey's and there was K , just this little three year old girl enjoying a birthday party. I admired her outfit from necklace (very nice) to matching flip flops. What a beautiful young lady she is. A big hug for me from her. I felt loved.

I came home last night to a greeting at the door. guess who? We are all very tired from being up late three nights in a row. She was needing comfort and a snack made by her mom and her bed. we all went to bed early after watching Rachel Rays $40.00 a day show. While laying in bed at 9:30, I thought about Annie and K and how they were not even home yet and here I am in bed. What a mom you are Annie! You too Kim! The things we do for the love we have for our daughters.

Books I picked up at the Library:

On Saturday during the Jam session K. pulled out the book she was reading, Barbra Kingsolver's "Animal Dreams" Why hadn't I read this yet?

Erika Hilliard's "Living Fully with shyness and social anxiety" a comprehensive guide to gaining social confidence. What the hell was I think?........ NEXT!

Marc Ian Barasch's "Field notes on the compassionate Life" A search for the soul of kindness"

Todd Tucker's "Notre Dame vs. The Klan" Looking forward to this book.......

The one I really am excited about is the "Exquisite Risk" Daring to live an authentic life by Mark Nepo. started it last night and I don't plan on stoppin.

I guess I'm good for a couple of weeks.

Anne P is going down to Charlotte North Carolina, for a tutu making class for 10 days. She was asking with hopeful eyes that someone would go along for the ride with her. I thought it would be a good opportunity for me to get down and see Lorrine, Wayne and Nicky Noodle. Talked with Tom about it and he thought it was a good idea. So I will visit for a few days with the Broome family and fly back compliments of the P's. I could use a few days away. AHHHHHHHHHHH.

Well, off to the allergist to see what allergies Kelsey has. We have been suspicious of milk and cats. Then off to the Ortho to get braces adjusted. Then the last day of piano and Script at holy cross. Back home in time to pack a dinner and see Tom off to work. My day is going fast and it's only 7:00 a.m.